1. This is an all-inclusive community, NOT a group for people of a particular gender or sexual orientation. Sexism, racism, biphobia and/or transphobia will not be tolerated, nor will inflammatory debates about those subjects. We aim to ensure that everyone is welcome in the group, in accordance with our safe space policy.
2. Do not personally attack or insult other members of the group. And if someone attacks you, do not respond in kind — report it to an admin. Any debates should be civil and respectful. This is also not a place for drama-baiting posts, including fanboyism and console wars.
3. Do not harass or knowingly cause discomfort to other members. If someone tells you that you’re bothering them, then stop.
4. No spam/advertising/sales posts. If you would like to promote something that you think is relevant to the group, but you aren’t sure if it’ll be okay, then run it past an admin.
5. Clearly mark spoilers and NSFW content, and make sure that neither will appear on people’s screens until they actually click your post.
Please report violations of these rules to an admin. Repeat offenders may receive temporary or permanent bans from the group.
If you have any feedback or concerns you’d like to raise with the admin team, you can do so with this form.
If you’re wondering who the admins are, and who to contact regarding a particular question or issue, you can find the current committee members here.
Feel free to approach any admin at any time if there’s something you’d like to chat about. You can also reach all of us at once by emailing [email protected], or sending a message to https://www.facebook.com/MelbourneGaymers. This is typically the fastest way to get a response, as anyone who is online will be able to see your message.
Below are some past statements of policy that have been archived for easy reference – some of this is now covered by our safe space policy, but we still want to make sure that anything important is accessible for new members to see.
Gender/Sexuality Inclusive Language and Behaviour
Melbourne Gaymers is a group for all geeks and gamers, regardless of sexuality or gender identity. Every member of the group needs to respect that, but there are some kinds of conduct which can put that inclusiveness at risk, and it is important that we talk about them. This is not in reference to any specific person(s) or incident(s) – it is about the culture and identity of our community going forward.
There have been many instances of language and jokes that can make other members feel uncomfortable – in particular, gaymers who are female, bisexual/pansexual, or transgender. These comments tend to follow an underlying theme: the presumption that the people at meetups are mostly, or solely, cisgender gay males. This belief tends to push people away, becoming a self-fulfilling prophecy. It builds a reputation that is off-putting to many queer gamers who don’t fit into the mainstream community, and might look to us for friendship and support.
It is absolutely vital that we do not inadvertently exclude people in the way we talk amongst ourselves as a community. While such comments are generally not intended to cause offense or upset anyone, this does not mean that they are harmless. Words have the power to make someone feel invisible, invalidated, and alienated. Nobody should ever feel like they don’t belong here, just because they don’t fall under a category that includes the majority of people in the room.
Speaking up when you feel this way can be extremely awkward and difficult. Nobody wants to be the one to start an argument or ruin the mood, especially when they’re scared that everyone else will be against them. So we cannot wait until somebody tells us that they feel uncomfortable. The responsibility for making people feel welcome falls upon all of us.
As such, please to try to avoid making assumptions, generalisations, or inappropriate comments about any member’s:
a) Sexuality, e.g. using “gay” as a blanket term
b) Gender identity (which, like sexuality, is invisible once you get past the stereotypes)
c) Genitals/physical sex characteristics, e.g. disparaging those you don’t have, asking what someone else has, or commenting on what you think people have
On a related note, we would also advise against using terms like “faggot” and “gay” as insults, or with negative connotations. We have to put up with more than enough of that language the rest of the time, and Melbourne Gaymers should be the one place in the gaming community where we can escape from it. Don’t just assume everyone else in the room will be comfortable with that sort of joking around, when it may just remind them of the bullying and casual homophobia they’ve endured in the past.
We understand that nobody wants to feel like they have to censor themselves, and we don’t want to censor you. We are, however, asking all members to make just a little bit of effort to ensure that Melbourne Gaymers remains a safe and inclusive space for everyone. As always, if you have any questions or concerns, you can bring them to myself or the other admins at any time.
Alcohol at Events
Many Melbourne Gaymers meetups occur at venues where alcohol is served, or at houses where people will bring their own drinks. Drinking is naturally going to be a noticeable part of meetups, so we want to make sure everyone is clear on the group’s guidelines around alcohol. Please keep the following in mind:
– Know how to pace your own drinking. While we are happy to have alcohol at events, it is not the primary focus of what Melbourne Gaymers does, and excessive drinking is discouraged. If your objective in attending a meetup is to have a big night out and get very drunk, you may wish to seek out somewhere else to do that.
– You are responsible for your behaviour while intoxicated. Anyone who reaches the point where they are making other members feel uncomfortable will be asked to leave, and may be restricted from attending future meetups.
– Be aware that other people at the meetup may not be drinking. Respect the wishes of those who just want to play games and/or socialise. Also remember that many of the sober people around you may be in a very different headspace – drinking is not part of their intentions for that event, and they might not be appreciative of obviously drunken behaviour.
This point of this isn’t to get too serious to stop people from having fun. This is really just about making sure that everyone who comes to Gaymers events has a good time, regardless of whether they’re drinking. So with that in mind, we hope this will help everyone to have as much fun as possible!